The Toy Dinosaur
These little kids grab me with their sticky, grubby hands
It seems every week they grow, getting taller and stronger
They squeeze me ever harder until one day, they seem to stop
I was left on my shelve, alone, untouched, unbothered
My old playmate walks by with people that look like him
He laughs, runs, and plays, but not with me
Maybe he is too big to play with me, maybe he doesn’t like me
All I can do is wait, unable to move, and unable to speak
4 comments:
You should change your poll. All of them are something like... THEY'RE ALL GREAT!
But to the toy dinosaur thing. It's good, but I have no idea what the meaning of the poem is. What is the toy's statement? What is he going to to tell us? That's the only criticism, but great job in showing us what it's like to be just a toy
its a plastic dinosaur, a kids toy. and yeh i know my poll is awesome :D
I noticed right away that your vocabulary was pretty good, but I noticed that you spelled shelf shelve. It walks through the life of a young child and his toy dinosaur, and how the kid grows up and has other toys that older kids like to play with instead of the dinosaur. The people that look like him are his friends? I don't get that line. I like your closing line about waiting.
I dont think its really in poem form and it sounds like a story or a run on sentence. It would be stronger if it was more structured. I think you could use a different word than "playmate" could be used in line 6. Maybe owner, boss or kid. Sice the dinosaur belongs to the kid and is also much smaller. Good poem Though!
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